Downward Spiral . . .

Conventional wisdom has it that one is in a downward spiral when a series of unfortunate events occur, seemingly coincidentally, until such time as it appears as though whatever choice said person makes is the wrong one. (Or something along those lines.)

That being said, is there such thing as a downward spiral? Can a person have such poor luck and/or poor timing that no decision makes sense, or that any decision made leads to the individual being worse off than he or she was before deciding? I think no. I think it happens for a reason, but what I know is we all go through times when we wish we did (or had done) things differently.

Why, then, can we not have the foresight to make the rightest decisions the FIRST time? Why look back? Why regret? We don’t have to. I believe in the good of people. I believe in the righteousness of people. I believe if things in your life are not exactly as you would like them to be, then there is something to that. Think of it as a Smithian (invisible hand) correction of your soul. It is not gloom and doom, we are not destined for despair, even when things are at their worst.

We, as the human animal, have all that is necessary (FROM BIRTH) to make our lives what we want them to be. Fates play a hand – but only when necessary. Destiny plays a hand – but only when necessary. I say – let the Universe be your guide. If you are feeling down, it is because your soul needs a break. If you are overtly excited, it is because your spirit needs a pick-me-up. If you think bad things keep happening to you, then look around and see what you need to change for the Universe to reciprocate. I am a big fan or reciprocity. “Do unto others . . .” and all that. The Universe, just as your neighbour, will shoot back to you what you shoot at it. If you want good things, then let good things into your life. If it is overwhelming and hard to understand, then try a tad harder to get it.

I understand. Maybe not as much as some, but more than most. It’s not difficult for me. If you know me, you may disagree, and that’s OK. (I still love you.) ;) Sometimes it takes me a minute, sometimes I need a correction, sometimes, oh sometimes, I need my ass kicked. But – when it happens, I am pretty sure I deserve it. It is not my place to argue with the laws of the Universe. It is my place to accept them – and maybe, just maybe, challenge them on occasion. But, I know the rules are simple – but I also know them to be true. (Now I feel like I should be in a Sacrament Meeting at the front of the ward with my arms crossed and my head bowed.) There is an old Japanese thing that says in order to be a the best you can be, you should possess the following (in no particular order):Bushido

  • Justice
  • Courage
  • Benevolence
  • Politeness
  • Honour
  • Loyalty
  • Self-control
  • Sincerity

I do not disagree with this list. If you can do these things, then you will be fine. There are lots of other rules that should be followed – such as Shinzui’s rule #1: Forgive; but they can be inferred by the list of 8 I have above. OK – the sermon is over. Thanks for listening. ;)



~ by shinshige on 18 April 2008.

3 Responses to “Downward Spiral . . .”

  1. I don’t think I necessarily deserve what I get, but I think there is a whole universal collective breathe being held to see how I will deal with said “what I get.” It’s all about the journey.

    People who have continued downward spiral patterns in their lives don’t know how to get out of their own way. And if per chance they did happen to get out of their way they wouldn’t know what to do. Some people live their lives to be down trodden and victims. IMO.

    Your blogs are kinna deep for me, but they make me think. thanks.

  2. I have had two downward spirals in my life… and not because of something that I did in this life. The first downward spiral was during several years of physical abuse from my parents. I vowed that I would never do it to someone else, and that I would leave as soon as it was safe to do so. I was in my 20s when I finally left them.

    The second downward spiral was when I became ill with Wegener’s Granulomatosis. Before this spiral, I had received my degree and was in the top of my graduating class. I was flying high. Every decision was wrong about my health. When I finally went into the hospital and was diagnosed it took almost four and a half years to get in to a quiet period. Even now I don’t have the energy to do what I was able to do before WG.

    Also, as I became sicker and sicker… my doctors would tell my husband, “well at least she won’t need a blood transfusion.” then two days later I would get a blood transfusion. Or “well, at least she won’t need dialysis.” and … you get the idea. I was spirally down to death.

    What saved me the second time was that I pulled all my stubborness and clawed my way back. If I hadn’t hung on even when it seemed hopeless, I wouldn’t be writing this comment right now.

    I don’t know if it is a self-correction or possibly karma from a past life, but if I hadn’t had that prolonged experience as a child, I might not have survived the second spiral.

    Yours, Cyn

  3. Great post. Thought provoking. I feel a rant coming on.

    Downward spirals? I’ve had more than a couple. The last one happened because I was chasing a fairy tale and they don’t exist. Damn. Then I beat myself up for about a year for being so stupid, made a lot of changes, and climbed out. (that’s another story) I’m finding that some of the regret is still lingering and affecting other aspects of my current reality. I’m working on becoming more aware of it and moving through it.

    As for being born with the capacity to shape our lives . . . we do that without even thinking about it. Literraly. What’s hard is changing our lives once we’ve started down a particular path. That requires actually thinking about it.

    I agree with you about being born with the capability to have a great life. I believe we wre born and are perfect beings. But we have forgotten that perfection. I believe that as children we get tainted when we learn the rules of co-existence and take on the psycho-spiritual-emotional burdens of our families. We get twisted and tweaked away from awareness of our pure, adventurous souls and the clarity of our innocence. We forget that we can just be. Then we spend the rest of our lives trying to rediscover the freedom we were born with. We try to strip away the layers of accumulated pretense we wear like armour just to get through the damn days. We mine our hearts and souls for the freedom we know is there, but can’t quite touch . . . Dig a little deeper. I know there’s a trick.

    As for your list. I have a big bone to pick with it. I’ve tried to be all the things on your list and failed most of the time. I think they can all be misused and completely misplaced. They all sound really nice, especailly Honor, but when I think about the honor killings of women in certain cultures, I find the word repulsive. Same for all the rest of them. Great in concept . . . oh wait . . . that’s what they are! Concepts. Ideas. They change with any cultural wind. Worse yet, they can misguide us into thinking we are okay and socially upstanding when we are really being quite self-destructive. Or arrogant. It’s possible to really beat yourself up for a notion. And most of these words remind me of of religion run amok. (that’s yet another story)

    Then again, I have a big time history of self-destructiveness and arrogance. And don’t forget the two divorces. (Oh boy – several more stories)

    When I worked in financial aid at Westminster my motto became “Fuck Nobility.” Why? Because someone influencial used the idea of nobility against everyone who wasn’t as noble (read “self-destructive workaholic”) as they. It hurt us all. (you guessed it – more stories)

    So these lists hold me less captive than they used to. But for me that’s okay because I have more and longer moments of peace and relative calm. I have fewer explosions of anger.

    My one word list these days is Awareness. If I’m aware enough of my immediate surroundings and the people in it, I seem to be better at taking the right action. Which may or may not be benevolent, honorable, charitable, etc. (For Cyn it was fighting back. Cyn, that’s an inspiring story. . . that’s real courage.)

    You know from downward spirals that something is really freakin’ wrong here. That’s awareness, too. that’s the first step in fixing it.

    But I’m alone a lot, and maybe I should test this life theory against a more populated reality. It’s easy to be tolerant of my cats. I can stand my own clutter, make my own schedule, live completely selfishly. No one would suspect that my farts smell just as bad as anyone else’s. Maybe worse. It’s easy to be tolerant and accepting when you’re isolated.

    Anyway, that’s my rant. Now if I can just work on Acceptance and getting out of this FREAKIN’ house. I promise to buy some Gas-X.

    Have fun in Vegas. You’ve really been on the move lately.


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